Ever since I had kids, I’ve tended to worry about the worst possible things happening.
It usually goes like this: I tumble into bed, all ready for a delicious sleep, my mind starts churning and before I know it, I’m imagining horrible scenarios that freak me out and make me cry. I am not kidding you, I once actually got to the point of crying. It was then that I realised I couldn’t do that any more.
So now, I have banned torturous thinking. If my brain starts going to those dark places, I just say No. Like that in my head: NO! And I make myself think of something else.
It reminds me of the work I do. I think clients often come to me believing that they need to disappear into their depths, to explore their hidden motivations, to uncover challenging truths before they can build the lives they really want.
I recognise that there can be great value in therapeutic work that explores different aspects of self. I also believe that in some cases, too much thinking can actually hinder positive progress. Sometimes it is more helpful to draw a line [just like my: NO!], to look at the current situation, to recognise strengths and values and then to draw on them in the pursuit of a happier existence.
So [as I said] I bought new swimmers recently. I really like swimmers shopping: it reminds me of summer [summer!] and I love the colours and the fabrics. To me, it feels like a treat.
Anyway. There I was, in the change rooms, when I heard a woman next door speaking about her body, to the lovely lady who worked in the shop.
She was being brutal: saying things about herself that were almost breathtakingly mean. It hurt my heart to hear it.
I wanted to run in there and say something, I don’t even know what. I just wanted her to stop hating herself so much and so vocally. But of course, I didn’t.
Instead, I looked in the mirror at my own beautiful [a.little.bit.crinkled.from.delicious.babies] body and sent myself a big dose of love.