Assume the best

One of the barriers I see getting in the way of coaching clients’ goal striving and attainment [and ultimately, in the way of their happiness and satisfaction] is making negative assumptions about others:

• My boss thinks I’m stupid
• Other mums think I’m incapable
• My partner thinks I’m unattractive
• My colleagues think I’m under-qualified
• My friends think I’m flaky

Often these assumptions operate furtively, sliding into your brain unannounced and affecting the way you think, feel and behave, often without you even realising.

• My boss thinks I’m stupid: so I don’t step up to challenges
• Other mums think I’m incapable: so I doubt my own capacity
• My partner thinks I’m unattractive: so I struggle with intimacy
• My colleagues think I’m under-qualified: so I hold back in meetings
• My friends think I’m flaky: so I tend to live up to this image

It can be helpful to get clear on the assumptions you’re making and catch them in operation. Once you know what’s going on, you can make conscious choices instead of allowing untested speculations shape your life.

Tags: life-coaching, Melbourne