Exceptions

When someone comes to me for coaching and says that they’re keen to make a positive change but they just can’t seem to make it happen I always listen out for a very particular thing: an exception.

+ I feel socially anxious, except when I’m hanging out with my sister’s friends

+ I struggle to find the motivation to exercise, except when I’m training for a race

+ I never have the courage to raise a big idea with my boss, except when I put it in an email first

+ I hate my job, except when I’m organising my team’s social events

Exceptions are critical because they change the narrative. It’s not that the desired activity is impossible, it’s just that the circumstances have to be right [it’s not you, it’s them, type thing..] Which means that you can achieve what you want to achieve, if you identify the requisite conditions and then apply them, more broadly.

So:

+ What is it about your sister’s friends and that social environment that leaves you feeling calm? How can you replicate those circumstances?

+ How can you always be working towards some sort of competition, so that you sustain motivation to train?

+ What does that initial email to your boss offer? And how can you encourage that, in other ways?

+ What is it about organising social events that you love and what other roles might offer that?

Exceptions broaden your possibilities for a Life Well Lived. And that is a very beautiful thing.

Tags: life-coaching, Melbourne