The right decision

Friday, July 26, 2019

One of the things I hear all the time as a life and career coach is this: I’m scared of making the wrong decision. Or this: I just need to make sure I’m making the right choice.

I am always curious in this situation, how the person in front of me tends to assess the decisions they make. The answer is usually this: a decision is good if the end result is pleasing and it is bad if the consequences are undesirable.

So, for example:

  • You leave a job but the culture at your new workplace is terrible = Bad Decision
  • You leave a job and the culture at your new workplace is great = Good Decision
  • You write a book but it never gets picked up by a publisher = Bad Decision
  • You write a book and it gets picked up by a publisher = Good Decision

But the thing is, when you’re making a decision, you can never access end-result information; an outcome can only be known in retrospect. So holding off on making a decision until you can be sure of a positive result is just a sure-fire way to keep yourself overthinking and stressing, staying stagnant and ruminating.

blegh.

There is a different, more nuanced way to think about decision-making. Maybe a decision is a good one if it aligns with what really matters to you, if it supports you in living the way you want to live. Regardless of the outcome.

So a decision to start a new job might be a good one because it: gives you more time to spend with your kids and focuses you on work that is meaningful. And maybe the decision to write a book is a good one because: it connects you with people you interview and you find inspiration from the process.

Using values rather than outcomes as a framework for assessing decisions takes a little while to adjust to but the result is incredibly empowering and liberating.


Tags: ,

POSTED BY Alex Kingsmill at 12:31 PM Email This Post Email This Post

«
»

THE CONFIDENCE PRIMER - And a brilliant boost, each month.